People laugh when I tell them that patience is my profession. They assume that it's only part of the job, or it's a pun on the word server. "You must be a long term investor" is common, as is bird-watcher. Very few understand that I am simply a professional waiter in the sense that I wait for things. When someone needs to wait for something, but they themselves are to impatient to wait, I am the person to call. I never wait on two things at the same time, nor do I wait for the impossible. Things that already happened cannot be waited on either. No, I wait on things that will happen no matter what. I wait for things no one else wants to. Imagine waiting for a lover to come back home. Though the pain of not having them is hard, the time spent waiting is bearable because of the love inherent to it. This does not require me. I am here for the waits no one else would want. Waiting for a lover to return home not knowing if they will. Waiting on the results of a test that has an equal probability of being good or bad. Waiting on answer to a question whose answer is unguessable. These are things no one would ever choose to wait for because these are the uncertain things. Things that are certain are easily waited on, as the reward is guaranteed. If there is a guarantee of no reward, then why wait? My business is being patient with things of unknown endings. My business is the business of accepting unknowability and living with it. It's easy once you've got the hang of it. Enjoyable almost. Staring at the clouds, taking long walks, simply laying in the grass, anything to pass the time. When the end is uncertain, there is no reason the use the time well. If it ends well, the time cannot said to be wasted as something good came of it. If it ends poorly, how can time full of nothing said to be wasted if nothing happened?

Written: Wed Jan 31 2018